Communing with Others

In discussing my recent blog about the harmonious voice of creation, I managed to get distracted from my original intent, despite the fact that I had given considerable thought to what I wanted to post. So I am going to add to my thoughts on music, despite Gretch's desire that I blog about "us" rather than "me". I argue that music is such a part of me that it is a part of us, and therefore I am not acting contrary to the intentions of our joint blog.

My original intent in revisiting the subject of musical performance was to discuss why I prefer to perform in ensembles. Even as I type, my father-in-law is trying to convince me to pull out my trumpet and improvise with him. But as I said before, I am not an improvisationalist, and I do not perform music for that reason.

So why do I perform music? Or, more importantly, why do I choose to perform music in ensembles? Further, why do I choose to perform music written by others and then performed by an ensemble?

The answer is, simply, this: community. I love the sense of community that comes from being in an ensemble. As a member of the trumpet section of dozens of bands and ensembles over the years, and even as a member of two mellophone ensembles, I have come to develop a deep and abiding sense of belonging that is associated with my musical persuasions. I know that every time I arrive on the Parkland College campus on Tuesday and Thursday evenings during the Fall and Spring semesters, I can look forward to seeing Jacob, Jeff, Greg, Jay, and, occasionally, Al, and we can all connect because we are the Trumpet Section of the Parkland Wind Ensemble. It doesn't matter that Greg is possibly old enough to be my grandfather, and that Jacob is a few years younger than me. We are a community.

Our community goes further than our section of the ensemble. The flutes, the oboes, the clarinets (of all flavours), the saxophones (also of many flavours), the bassoons, the French horns, the trumpets, the trombones, the euphoniums, the tubas, and the percussion all create a larger community that comes together to commune with one another. We rarely commune through our words, though. Rather, we commune through our music. We know when a member of our ensemble is ill, or not feeling well, through the music that he or she performs. We know when our conductor is having a rough day, and we know when the Cardinals have just won an important game. We come together and we support one another.

We don't simply play notes on the page, either. Despite what some think, music performance is much more than simply playing what another has written. No group ever plays the same piece of music the same way. Even on the rare occasions that we listen to a recording of a piece, it is merely to give a general sense of the piece, never to give a target for how we wish to sound. The greatest feeling, as an ensemble musician, is when we have finished performing, and we realise that we have all truly performed. It is a joy I have felt many times, and a joy I expect to feel many times in the future.

Does this mean that I don't think I can get the same feeling from other sources? Does this mean that I disdain those who choose to perform in different ways? Not at all. I admit that the main reason I personally turn away from other forms of performance is simply that I have no desire to do so.

I have a level of expectation that I hold myself to. I seek to rise to that level of expectation. I have the ganas for what I do. I don't have it for what others do. That is why I am an ensemble performer.