Top Ten Lessons from Jurassic Park

By -
I love the movie Jurassic Park. It was one of the few films I can remember going to the theatre to see with my entire family when I was growing up. I am pretty certain I fell asleep during the opening sequence, but that didn't stop me from loving it.

When my sister Ariana was very young, I was given the task of baby-sitting her over the summer while my sister Amanda was hanging out with Tom and Tabitha in Utah and my brother Adam was causing trouble in Germany. All of my other brothers had moved out. During this summer, we cleaned the house every morning while listening to Les Miserables. Then we would watch the VH1 Top Ten Countdown. After that, we did all sorts of fun things.

One day, Ariana was in a bad mood and just didn't want to do anything. I finally put in a movie. And, despite her young age, she watched it. As the film progressed, she didn't get scared or cry or anything. Except laugh. Especially when the T-Rex ate the lawyer. Yes, folks, I showed Jurassic Park to a very young child. And she loved it! We also watched the uber-cheesy Mormon musical-made-film, Saturday's Warrior. And, despite the incorrect doctrines, cheesy dialogue, false pretenses, and various other shortcomings, I still love this movie, and, I like to think, so does she.

Recently these movies both came up in a conversation with some friends online. As a result, I have compiled the following list, in no particular order, of the top ten things I have learned from the movie Jurassic Park.

1) No matter how dedicated you are to your current project, never pass up the opportunity to appease a crazy rich old man and, in the process, procure funding for many, many years.

2) The best things in life are presented as a complete surprise. Sure, I could tell you what I've done, but it is so much cooler to let you see it, with absolutely no warning whatsoever.

3) Lawyers will always run away and, as a result, get eaten alive. This is cause for laughter.

4) Everyone needs a friend with a big gun nearby.

5) Dressing in black doesn't make you cool. It just makes you look crazy.

6) Children know far more about modern technology than adults ever will. Don't fight it.

7) Green jello is an excellent tool for identifying seismic tremors.

8) Learn to work in a team, like the velociraptors do.

9) A soaring musical score will make your life that much more amazing.

10) When all is said and done, women will rule the earth.

Comments

Tom/Tabitha said…
Not sure why, but Timothy and Christopher also found this sequence tremendously funny when watching this movie for the first time a week ago.
March 3, 2010 at 9:20 AM
The Margin Wight said…
And let's not forget the rules governing who sticks their entire army into the steaming pile of dino-poo.
March 4, 2010 at 9:01 PM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Who Am I? On Iconography, Faith, and Self-Identity

By -
Image
In one of the great classic works of French literature, the author Victor Hugo tells the story of Jean Valjean, a man who spent nineteen years in prison, growing angrier and more filled with hate toward the world with each passing day. The first five years were for stealing a loaf of bread to feed his sister’s starving family, but then he suffered for fourteen additional years for attempting to run away. The story of Les Misérables follows his journey from his release from prison on parole to a life of service, sacrifice, love, mercy, grace, and, ultimately, redemption. In the musical adaptation of this story, a pivotal moment takes place early in the story when Jean Valjean, who had been gifted a meal and safe shelter for the night from a kindly bishop, gives in to temptation, steals the bishop’s silverware and runs off, only to be captured by the local constables. Valjean claims that the silver was given as a gift from the bishop but the police, not believing the words of a cri...
Read more

Make A Joyful Noise

By -
My father-in-law recently blogged about music, and lamented that Western society does not produce music except for the purpose of providing entertaining diversions. While I am sorely tempted to link to his blog, I will refrain. Rather, I wish to simply present my own thoughts on why I consume music. And consume it I do. I love music. I devour it. It is a part of my being. Gretch and I almost always have music playing in our home, in the car, and when we are working (and can get away with it). I do not know when my love of music first emerged, but I would argue that it has always been with me. My own father is a talented musician, although I fear there are times when this talent has been hidden from the world. Yet some of my earliest recollections of my childhood include Dad breaking out his amazingly awesome Martin D35 acoustic guitar and playing songs like "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" by The Tokens, "Boogie" by John Hartford, and various songs from the world of classi...
Read more

Who Are You?

By -
A thought has been running through my mind this morning and it doesn't seem to be planning on leaving any time soon. I have things I need to get done (such as applying for more jobs for the coming school year), so I am hoping that this may help me at least share the thought well enough that I can worry about other things. The thought is really more of a question. Who am I? Who are you? How do I define myself? How do you define yourself? So often in our lives, we have opportunities to introduce ourselves to new people. I've mentioned before how I have this habit of introducing myself as Alex Valencic but, if I am writing my name, it is always Alex T. Valencic. After sharing my name, it is inevitable that someone will want to know more about me, and the first thing they ask is what I do. How we respond to this question says a lot about what we think of ourselves, I think. When someone asks me what I do, I respond by either saying I am a teacher or I am a professional educat...
Read more